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The blood red roses darken the woods as I was blinded by the sun piercing through the trees as it makes a reflection from the creek. The sweet scent of flora covering the forest floor as the trickling water flowing softly down the stream a voice telling me to follow as she steps closer to me drowns out the creek when the metallic taste of the expired water in my bottle when I feel the nerves in my stomach telling me to run but my body decides to stay where it is in the Ice cold creek beneath me, with the frozen water leaking through my shoes I decide to stay and see what this person wants . . .
Hi Matt. Callum from across the room here. I really like your story. It pulled me in from the first sentence. also like how you finished on a cliff hanger it keeps people waiting.
ReplyDeleteKia ora Matt Its Morgan here. I really like your descriptive writing I think that it is really cool and descriptive. I really like the sentence the blood red roses darken the woods. E Noho ra (bye).
ReplyDeleteKia Ora Matt
ReplyDeleteGreat descriptive writing! You really made a picture of the scene in the readers head. You also really built up the suspense and made me want to read more!
Maybe next time you could go through and check it a few times because, I didn't quite understand some parts (maybe its just me).
What are you going to write about next time? When do you think your going to write again and what genre?
Your good friend
Emil